Monday, October 17, 2005

Magic Monday

Is there a Dr. Salt?

Isn't hot water already hot?

Can you grow birds by planting birdseed?

Just before someone gets nervous, do they experience cocoons in their stomach?

Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"?

There are 24 hours in a day, and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

What came first the chicken or the egg?

What color is a chameleon on a mirror?

What color would a smurf turn if you choked it?

What did we do before the Law of Gravity was passed?

What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

What do sheep count when they can't sleep?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

What does it mean if you break a mirror with a rabbits foot?

What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?

What happened to the first 6 ups?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

What happens when you call a 1-800 number collect?

What is a free gift?

Aren't all gifts free?

What is another word for "thesaurus"?

What is the speed of dark?

What part of the monkey do you use a monkey wrench on?

What's another word for synonym?

When blind people go to the bathroom, how do they know when they are done wiping their butt?

When people lose weight, where does it go?

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

When vultures are on their deathbed, are they ever tempted to eat themselves?

When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

When you're sending someone styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Where are Preparations A through G?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

Who invented accents?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why are the cabs from the Yellow Cab Company painted orange?

Why are there never any artist's materials in a drawing room?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?

Why are we afraid of falling?

Shouldn't we be afraid of the sudden stop?

Why aren't there bulletproof pants?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why didn't Luke Skywalker tell Darth Vader to turn to the light side of the Force?

Why do airlines call flights nonstop?

Won't they all stop eventually?


Blogger Chip Nelson said...

Yesterday I had a near death experience with the law of gravity. It seems as if it may be like God, always has been always will be. At least that was my vantage point. Good work by the way, keep it coming.

3:42 PM  

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